Back at Rahaya Guest House
Last year I stayed at Rahaya Guest House in Seminyak for a week and really enjoyed it. It has very local balinese feel about it and is somewhere I feel at home. The owner is extremely friendly, it is located away from Seminyak and quite, but close enough that I can enjoy great the beach and great places to eat.
Focus on this new blog
I made effort this morning to focus for the first hours on my this blog. I’ve made quite a few changes to the web site content and uploaded a few posts.
I’ve also had a look at my first book. Wow I’ve learnt so much about writing books since I first wrote the book. As a result I am realising it’s going to take quite a bit of effort to create version 2.0. The structure needs to be completely reworked, new content added to existing narrative and new section added the carry on when the book originally ended.
I’ve extended my stay here by 5 nights. Meaning I’ll be here in Bali for at least 2 weeks. Why? Because I think it’s a good place for me to focus on my writing and also socialise.
My concern is that heading out to the Molukkan Islands straight away will not be good, as I’ll feel isolated. But that’s my next destination.
I’m sorting out my social scene here. It’s a great place to meet up with people, both local and other expats. Many of the expats staying on the island have a really positive mindset. One thing I have observed is that there appears to be more expat women than men on this island.
I’ve got myself a haircut today and also had some reflexology. The lady doing the reflexology did a great job, getting me off to sleep and afterwards I felt and still feel so relaxed.
Grieving
I was in a shopping centre earlier on, I felt extremely sad that Grace was not with me. She would have looked amazing here in Bali. Her skin would have tanned a beautiful colour and she had a great body. She was a beautiful both on the outside and inside.
As you can see the grief is definitely there. With lots of trigger moments on some days. These tend to be primarily as a result of doing something that I would have otherwise done with Grace, or having fun and feeling guilty that I cannot do it with her.
Someone else?
Grace was easy going, engaging, friendly and fun. Yet also committed, supportive and focused when she needed to be. She was unique and there will be never anyone like Grace again in my life. As T says I am very much unavailable. I miss intimacy, but I am ready to let someone in.
