Dear Grace,
Writing you to make so much sense
I need to write to you more! It keeps me connected to you and helps me reflect on challenges, thinking about how you’d tackle them. I’ve realized it’s so much easier to talk to someone who really knows me. This approach feels right, and it’s helping me review my content strategy for the blog and the website. The blog is becoming a space to share these letters, sharing my grief but also my growth as I move forward day by day without you. I want the content to feel real, authentic, and genuine—because that’s who I am. These letters help me do that.
By the way, both websites, Thinking of Grace and Our FTD Story, are now up to date. That’s a good feeling.
Feeling Free
Everything I do these days is for personal growth and satisfaction, not money. It feels so liberating! When I used to work, money often dictated what I did and how I did it. Now, it’s my values and the memories of you guiding me, and that feels so much more meaningful.
Learning Spanish
I think I could be learning Spanish faster if I spent more time in class each day or did extracurricular activities, but I’m okay with the pace. I’m doing a lot of homework without needing to be prompted, which feels good. I’m revisiting old lessons and have decided to aim for completing the A2 level before heading to Spain. It’s a solid goal, and I think you’d be proud.
Waiting for the Cyst Results
I’ve been thinking—what if the biopsy results come back with bad news? Well, if that’s the case, so be it. Every day I live now feels like a bonus, and I’m grateful for that.
Thinking of You Eating Chicken Korma
Oh, and last night, I ordered chicken korma with pilau rice and naan bread. You would have loved it. I’ve also started buying the fresh loaves of bread you always appreciated. As I write these words, I feel happy thinking of you. Your memory doesn’t have to be tied only to sadness and loss. You bring me joy.
Robot Vacuum Cleaner
You’d absolutely love the robot vacuum cleaner and mop! This morning, I sprayed the floor with cleaning liquid and let the little robot do its thing. It’s not perfect—it gets stuck sometimes, and I give it a hand, or I’ll use the manual mop to finish up—but it does 90% of the work. Then it vacuums. Honestly, why didn’t I get one of these sooner?
El President needs to get out the way
Things are okay. I’m dealing with “El President” by continuing to make progress, even though he’s trying to get in the way. It’s frustrating because it’s all about his personal ego, which pisses me off. Thankfully, I’ve got support from other residents who feel the same way. I’m trying to channel “Grace” in handling this—your patience, your calmness—but with a little bit of my own style thrown in.
Right now, I’m working on figuring out the original color of the external walls of the apartments. Everyone has different opinions, of course. It’s a bit of a hassle, but I’m confident we’ll sort it out. I keep reminding myself that creating a sense of community is the bigger goal. Once that’s established, I think we’ll find common ground more easily.
Dinner in Torrevieja Tonight
Tonight, I’m having dinner with a fellow (and now former) Spanish classmate in Torrevieja. He’s a nice guy with an open and independent mind. He lived in China for 10 years and, coincidentally, also lives in Rotterdam. It should be an interesting evening.
Miss you and love you,
David.
